Hi Reader!

The phrase self-love is thrown around so much these days.

It's what I do in my work - help my clients fall in love with themselves. (If you're ready to explore this work together, you can schedule a Cosmic Clarity Call here.)

But what does self-love really mean, anyway? And is it even fully possible?

This Monday I received a reading from my new friend who is a Human Design coach and energy healer. She told me that part of me was hiding. She said it looked like I was in a dark cave, afraid to emerge into the light.

"Wow," I told her, "I knew there was a part of me that was afraid to be seen, but I didn't know it was that extreme."

And yet, when I really think about it, I'm constantly hiding parts of myself away, or feeling like I need to be different than who I am in order to be accepted. I'm too "out there" and "woo woo" for my Jewish family. I was too "serious and monotone" to be an elementary school teacher (according to my principal, anyway).

I live in the online business world, yet my moments of greatest joy happen when I do readings for people in person. Tarot reading and astrology are typically used for one-off sessions, but I'm designed to go deep with people.

Sometimes I wonder, Why am I such a weirdo? Why don't I fit in? Why can't I just do what seems to work for everyone else?

Yet I know I'm not uniquely fucked up, because I see this theme emerge in most of the readings I do.

Most birth charts are a mishmash of planets in different signs trying to work together despite having nothing in common. I've never done a reading where my client told me they fully embodied every part of their chart, that no piece of them was rejected by the other parts.

There are almost always parts of the chart that are unconscious, too. Parts of us are invisible to us, but visible to everyone around us.

So how can we fully love ourselves when we're literally designed to have inner conflict? When we're constantly, both consciously and unconsciously, hiding different parts of us to be accepted and loved?

Maybe the goal isn't to fully love every part of us all of the time.

Maybe the goal is to accept that there will always be inner conflict. There will always be parts of ourselves that are easier to love and accept than others. There will always be the need to put on a mask to be accepted sometimes. There will always be parts that we don't know we're rejecting because they've been so thoroughly banished to the outer reaches of our psyche.

Maybe the goal is to say, "Yes, I am a complex motherfucker. I reject parts of myself, I hide them, I judge them. And that's okay. Because I'm human."

This is the real work - not achieving perfect self-love, but accepting our complexity.

And then to lovingly, for the rest of our lives, learn to invite those parts back in, one by one, and get to know ourselves better, one day at a time.

Warmly,

Daniela

P.S. The real work isn't about achieving perfect self-love - it's about accepting our beautiful, messy complexity. If that resonates, I'd love to support you on this journey.​

🎴 This Week's Tarot Pull:

Pull a card by clicking below! 👇🏼

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📆 Upcoming Events:

I'll be at the Downtown Denver BAZAAR on 16th Street Mall on 5/31 and 6/1. I got a brand new tent setup, and I'm SO excited to do readings there! I'll share more details when they're released.

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