Hi Reader,
I hope you're doing well and haven't been too impacted by the Super Moon in Aries this week. I've been kind of struggling, but I'm glad I know where it's coming from at least!
Today, I want to share a story with you - something that happened on Monday that reminded me why I do this work.
Two years ago, I finalized my divorce. I wish that was the end of the story, and that my ex and I moved on with our lives and learned to coexist without drama. But unfortunately, that's not what happened.
For the past two years, I've been on an intensive healing journey. I've been unlearning codependent tendencies, learning to set kind but firm boundaries, and building a life that's based on what lights me up and allows me to do the work I want to do in the world.
It hasn't been easy, and tbh, I'm proud of myself.
My ex, on the other hand, hasn't moved on at all. He badmouths me to our daughter and generally tries to make my life as difficult as possible. But, because of my own inner work, I'm usually able to brush off his toxicity and not let it impact me too much.
But then, on Monday, he went a bit too far and it really rattled me.
Picture this: I'm in a parking lot, picking up my daughter from my ex. It should have been a simple exchange, right? Instead, I found myself cornered by a man who, two years post-divorce, is still wielding blame like it's a weapon and I'm the target.
According to him, I'm apparently responsible for everything from his bad hair days to the state of the global economy. (Okay, I might be exaggerating, but only a little.)
Even though I refused to let him make me responsible for his rage and depression, cut him off and didn't continue the conversation, it still hurt. It brought up a tsunami of old feelings - guilt, sadness, and the feeling that I would be stuck in this rerun of "The Enraged Ex" until my six year old daughter turns 18.
For a day, I let myself wallow. I drowned my sorrow in chicken wings, binged on House of the Dragon, and generally felt like even though I've done so much work, I'm still stuck at square one. After having a ton of momentum in my life and business for the past few months, I felt like I was suddenly frozen and unable to do anything.
It took me two days of feeling sad and frozen to remember - I have tools for this.
I hung up in the middle of a group Zoom call (don't worry, attendance was optional) and I reached for my tarot deck.
Now, let me be clear: I didn't expect the cards to magically solve my problems or suddenly make my ex see the error of his ways. (Though if you know a tarot spread for that, call me.)
What I was looking for was perspective, a way to reconnect with my inner wisdom and take care of my inner child. Because even though my ex is hell-bent on making me responsible for his feelings, I know that the only person who can heal me is myself.
I pulled out the Queen of Swords, and let me tell you, she had some things to say about boundaries.
She reminded me that I have the power to cut through the noise, to separate truth from fiction. She reminded me that my worth isn't determined by someone else's narrative about me. And most importantly, she reminded me that setting boundaries isn't just about keeping others out - it's about creating a safe space for myself to thrive.
As I sat with this wisdom, I felt the weight on my chest begin to lift. I remembered that healing isn't a straight line - it's more like a dance, two steps forward, one step back, occasional jazz hands when you're feeling sassy.
It reminded me that I can still set healthy boundaries - both with him, and within myself. I don't have to wait for him to be healed in order to keep building the life I want to live.
This experience showed me that even when we've done a ton of work, even when we think we've cracked the boundary-setting code, old wounds can still be tender. And that's okay.
It's not a failure; it's just part of being human. The real magic lies not in never feeling hurt, but in how quickly we can come back to ourselves, how we can reinforce our boundaries and find our center even when life tries to push us off balance.
If any part of this story resonates with you, if you're navigating the choppy waters of a past relationship or trying to stay steady when others try to cross your carefully set boundaries, I want you to know: you're not alone on this journey.
This is why I created Worthy Heart Cosmic Coaching.
Because life and relationships are challenging, and it helps to have tools to bring us back to ourselves, center our own power, and stand sturdy in the midst of the storm (and immature people).
In our work together, we use tarot, astrology, and simple yet powerful rituals to:
- Strengthen your emotional boundaries
- Reconnect with your inner wisdom when you need it the most
- Release guilt and old narratives
- Cultivate a love for yourself that can weather any emotional storm
- ...and more.
This isn't about becoming some unshakeable, eternally zen goddess who never has a bad day. It's about embracing all of you - the strong days, the wobbly days, and everything in between. It's about building a relationship with yourself that's so solid, you can open your heart without fear of losing yourself.
If you're ready to embark on this journey of self-discovery and healing, I'd be honored to be your guide. Click here to learn about Worthy Heart Cosmic Coaching, and to set up a complimentary coaching call where I'll look at your birth chart, pull some tarot cards, and we'll explore how working with me can support you in writing your own story and setting boundaries like the powerful queen (or king) you are.
Sending you warmth and strength,
Daniela